World Con: DisCon III

 I'm sitting in the restaurant of the Omni hotel in DC. It's a gorgeous, historical luxury hotel with the concomitant luxury prices for everything, which is why I brought most of my own food and drink. I've been having a wonderful time just talking with old friends, with the young guns, with my new favorite authors.

The weather has been spectacular too. I was outdoors a lot yesterday on the "porch" -- a giant verandah overlooking the river, with a lower court and even a folly.

I got to a reading from one of my fan-girl squee authors, A.C. Wise. She read from Hook, the forthcoming sequel to Wendy, Darling, featuring the tales of James, an aged opium-smoking drunkard who resists returning to Neverland and the boy who kills him over and over and over. It is just as heart-wrenching and heart-rending a portrait as Wendy, Darling. If you haven't read that one, you should.

Meanwhile, the Omni is built on several half-levels connected by stairs and elevators that may or not get you where you need to go. I never did find one of the panels I wanted to attend, but since I ended up in the garage, which is doubling as the dealer's room, I made do.

Here's my initial filky response to my experiences so far: 

DisCon III

Well, let me tell you the story of a fan named Charlie, such a ghastly tragedy
He put his handy schedule in his blue jean pockets and went down to DisCon III.

But did he ever return? No, he never returned, and his fate’s a mystery
He may walk forever through  the halls of the Omni 'cause he came to DisCon III.

He loved Star Trek and Star Wars and he dressed like the Doctor 
and he’d read all the operas in space
He wore elf ears and steam goggles and his hair was dyed rainbow; 
he’s a model of the true fen race.

Charlie strode off that morning with a hopeful spirit 
and he waited for the lift to come.
When it got there two hours later, he was starved and dehydrated
and his legs and feet were numb.

And did he ever return? No, he never returned, and his fate’s a mystery
He may walk forever through  the halls of the Omni 'cause he came to DisCon III.

Charlie got to the lobby, and was so excited 
to see scores of fen in line
The queue for registration took another six hours
Charlie wouldn’t have time to dine.

Charlie finished up a panel in the Diplomat Ballroom
And he aimed for the Capitol Room
He just couldn’t wait to hear a reading from his favorite author
Or her tale of ghosts and gloom

The queue for the lift was long, hot, and sweaty
Charlie thought he would take the stairway
There were flights up and flights down, and stairs that went nowhere
Charlie just couldn’t find his way.

And did he ever return? No, he never returned, and his fate’s a mystery
He may walk forever through  the halls of the Omni 'cause he came to DisCon III.

Charlie wandered the Palladium and he stumbled up a staircase
And went right down the other side.
It took twenty more minutes ‘til he found the elevator
And by the he felt about to die.

Charlie finally found the Promenade he thought he was seeking
But alas, it was west, not east.
Down a hallway, round a corner, and go past the elevator
Charlie couldn’t find his way in the least

And did he ever return? No, he never returned, and his fate’s a mystery
He may walk forever through  the halls of the Omni 'cause he came to DisCon III.

He found ops and listening posts and even gender-neutral bathrooms
And a sign that pointed out his way.
That hall took him to the Blue Room and a sideroom called Prefunction
Charlie wondered if he’d last the day.

Charlie missed the reading, and he missed his dinner
And he missed John Scalzi’s soiree.
Never got to the firepit or the upper floor parties
Poor old Charlie simply passed away.

But did he ever return? No, he never returned, and his fate’s a mystery
He will haunt forever all these halls of the Omni 'cause he came to DisCon III.

Amazon Writer (writer!)

Sir or madam, will you read my book,
It took me hours to write it, won’t you have a look?
My friends all tell me that it’s kinda cool
And I need to publish so I’m gonna be an Amazon Writer… Amazon Writer

An epic story 'bout some squids in space
It’s a metaphor for my lack of dates
Three thousand pages, it’s a trilogy
I can’t spell or punctuate so that’s why I’m an Amazon Writer… Amazon Writer

If you like it you can tell your friends or Tweet
I can write a sequel in another week 
The e-book’s wonky, I was in a rush
But it’s $.99 on Kindle, I’m an Amazon Writer… Amazon Writer

More silliness to ensue, I'm sure. I still have three more days!